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Sushmita Sen: She’s a diamond, sorry custodians of patriarchy, caste, and sexist sense of entitlement


Sushmita Sen is and remains the epitome of the modern, educated, liberal and independent woman of today’s time where she needs no approval from anybody for choices made.  She has never been one to be cowed down or for that matter seek our society’s approval for it’s not in her to be apologetic be it career choice, the decision to adopt two daughters, or for that matter, personal, intimate relations. I wonder why Sushmita’s choice will depend on Twitter trolls telling who to date or not to?!

Image credit: Sushmita Sen on Twitter: https://mobile.twitter.com/thesushmitasen/status/1548285876580388866/photo/1 courtesy Alisah Sen.

It begets the question still. It’s not about gold or diamond for we are past the mere nau lakh ka haar era or Zamana. Sushmita has always been a woman ahead of her time and for once, the so-called flag bearer of morality should hold the moral compass to their faces rather than whining about Hindustani culture, jingoism, or misplaced patriotism. If there is one thing that should shut them up is the fact and perhaps needs to be reminded that SHE is the one who brought the first Miss Universe crown back home.

One thing that I have always loved about Sushmita be it during her younger days or now is the fact that she never shied to confess about the man she loved, be it someone younger or older to her. It doesn’t even matter yet we are shaming someone for ageism which is downright sexist in the first place. As it is, what’s age got to do with every single fuck? A true ambassador of love she is and that is how love should be celebrated every single moment. True, in those days there were no useless trolls but patriarchy has always figured out ways to work out their silly shenanigans into shaming a woman and now, trickling into social media, giving them a fake orgasm.

Ironically so, such by-product of patriarchy and ingrained sexism lies in their thews and not brains. How we have suddenly become a moral custodian and making it our royally ascribed, similar to landlords, feudalism or that matter, ‘higher caste entitlement’ to decide who a woman should love or shouldn’t! It trickles into the ingrained patriarchal mindset percolating our society like an incurable disease and we dare to speak about women’s rights or celebrate gender parity. Till we don’t change our feudal mentality, don’t celebrate International Women’s Day or else it’s mere tokenism.

We are nothing short of voyeurism and therein lies our indecency, and shamelessness in peeking at what others are doing in their private lives. Peeping Toms just got a lifespan. It’s not a question of the other Modi, Lalit Modi, or the EPL meeting one of the hottest women on the silver screen Sushmita Sen. Honestly speaking, I find it quite an odd match but then I am no one to judge nor do I have the right to decide on the choice of someone else. Both of them don’t owe me or you a living.

Sometimes, I wonder whether hitting on Sushmita Sen and her man doesn’t whittle our personal frustration, our innate inability to love or have sex. Yes, you read it, right. Sushmita embodies today’s independent woman who has been at the receiving end of sexism, age shamed or simply shamed for being who she is as a person.  Patriarchy needs to be addressed and the time is now. It’s not just about Sushmita but any independent woman, be it her choice in keeping her maiden name, not wearing mangalsutra, bhindi or burqa and for that matter, not taking the husband or father’s name.  There is something called Consenting Adults, the right to love, sleep or have sex with whoever they want, except that the big C for Consent applies only to men and not women. Speaking about our double standards!

Sadly, it’s the reality, and not later than last week I had a conversation with an old uncle about something totally unrelated to Sushmita Sen and he loquaciously told me that every woman is a skimmer. Such ingrained patriarchy has got a knack to justify everything in their handbook and when you try to dispute their claim, mothball flung at you, ‘You’ve known very less women.’

This is the problem with such people belonging to the bygone era who will not stop at anything to label a woman. Name it, you get it. Gold digger, man-eater…as if it’s some pristine food in the Adam cum Eve era. Bring the fruit of passion, will you! I ain’t stopping here…slut for exploring relations, or Cougar. I may stop here but it never ceases to amaze me at their alacrity in the way they justify things owing to their blindness of such extreme faith where they will stop at nothing to show a woman her place and lack the balls to question such obnoxious rules.

Truth is that such men but also women shaming women are perverts, unable to take a woman’s freedom and throwing a spew of insults and venom. Sushmita Sen is not the only woman whom they can’t digest. There is Malaika Arora who constantly gets age-shamed or other celebrities fat-shamed. Let me not get started on how Twitter trolls threaten with rape fearless women journalists or celebrities who strode fearlessly and questioned their supremacy or rules, trickling from caste superiority to male dominance.

The problem runs much deeper in our social strata, owing to such social conditioning with their so-called rules book what a woman should or shouldn’t do and what she should wear or not…this dress is too short na and it’s tempting innocent boys. The woman becomes the dreaded foe of their so-called social cum patriarchal rules when she asserts herself and makes no mistake about it, the urge to ward off the threat, going to extent of calling her a witch or bitch works big time in their handbook. Call it an unfortunate truth or not, the naysayers know how to pick at the embodiment of independence and freedom since it’s too much to digest for them and that too coming from a woman.

Say hello to the ugly, hypocritical, masochist society we live in and Sushmita has provided enough fodder to insignificant trolls on social media. A ‘welcome change’ to boycott Bollywood hashtag trending. Today, it’s Sushmita Sen and tomorrow it will be another ‘HER’ perceived as a threat to our so-called morality and traditions, mouthing ‘Dharma’ all over. Hey, self-appointed custodians of traditions, isn’t it!

Love

V

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Not just a woman


Not just a woman,

 You are strength,

an extraordinary force,

independent in choices,

some lack this privilege,

still you are a force,

city women,

home maker,

in far flung villages,

sinking in this womb of invisibility,

suffering bruises,

conquering fear every single day,

migrant laborer,

single woman with a child,

married or separated,

nobody can take away your thunder,

facing wrath of patriarchy and inequality,

undergoing turmoil and mental stress,

yet you shine,

being You,

don’t need tokenism,

a fight to respect your identity,

not usurping your past or present,

i honor the power you hold within,

 Goddess fighting everyday,

 warrior ignored for her sacrifice,

Happy Women Day

V

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International Women Day: Beyond gender roles, choice and equality


A woman is beyond gender bender roles and expectations of who she is or stands for in our forever judgmental society. Watched at every single moment on how she looks, fat or skinny, pretty or disheveled, argumentative or submissive, aspersions cast on her character and what she decides to wear. Her body, her choice to drape in a sari, wearing a hijab, short skirt or swimsuit at the pool is lost by society, limited as we are as men and women pretending to hold a lense to judge.

The celebration of International Women Day on April 8 is one such day to reflect on the place women hold in society and no we don’t need tokenism to do that. Perhaps reminding ourselves and everyone that she is not just a body or tight-lipped listening silently to ‘obsolete’ rules made over the years. A woman is no doll in adhering to rules that need to be questioned from time to time or at every juncture. We are doing no favor to anyone or her by sending flowers or wishing on social media.

The attitudinal change towards respecting a woman’s choice, having a child or not, working after marriage and the right to not marry at all is what we need to reflect on without being labeled easy after facing sexual harassment and rape. There is not an instance when we haven’t shamed a woman for the choices made and hiding crime by making the ‘victim’ a crime perpetrator. Oh! Well! She asked for it, right!

 

Representational purpose.
Image credit: Google/India today:

A woman doesn’t need or shouldn’t be labeled as a daughter, wife, or mother but is a free individual who has a right to live the way she believes, the right saying no to sex, crying, having a day out or looking terrible. We need to stop telling her how to act in front of guests or pretend to smile when having a bad day. She has every right to look terrible and not fake it in looking good all the times. Throwing a fit and being emotional, is what makes a unique person or human. No! She will not shame you or the false entitled society by being herself. Deciding for a woman is not exclusively a male domain. She is not here nursing your male ego.

While women are aiming for the moon and breaking the glasnost fighting for equality in the board room, the economics or balance of power are still eluding them. Blame it on the power game or not, the legitimate question to ask is why equal salary for equal work is lost and trickling to women shaming on social media. The vulnerability whittles down to both social media and society when a woman shows the baby bump and if you think, the entire madness has stopped after delivery, think again. The ruthless body shame on gaining fat post-pregnancy and how we overlook the fact that many women through postnatal depression, making us insensitive just because she is a woman. Who says she gets it easy! We blatantly ignore how important it is for a mother to feed a newborn baby but see only body fat!

Hitting a woman and humiliating her constantly in public to remind that she is not good enough or should be confined in the kitchen shows that we are far away in carving equality and how decades of patriarchy is still gaining upper hand. We often hear the ingrained sexism on who wears the pants! What if the woman wears the pants! How it hurts our ego and hitting back with the senseless argument on not all men…We don’t always need to counteract but as men try to be equal partners, standing for a woman if we truly believe in equality. First, change the flawed textbooks theories on segregated gender roles and equality starts at school.

 

Happy International Women Day

Love

V

 

 

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A letter to women


Dear women,

As the International Women Day was celebrated on March 8, Indra Nooyi former Pepsi Co CEO’s quote rang into the mind, “No women can’t have it all.” The words hold significance on the odds stacked against women, be it in the upper crust of society, distant villages, corporate world, and film industry, albeit in daily life.

Open a newspaper and a day doesn’t go without reports about mental and physical harassment against women, rape, and charges of dowry or for that matter, many of you are treated like a servant in a household, irrespective of the education level.

 

Image credit: Google.

Rare is the cases about strong women, armed with courage to call off a wedding or walking away from a bad marriage to protest against the cavalier attitude enshrined in the patriarchal world. Not long ago, the Supreme Court issued an order allowing women entering the Sabarimala temple and we all know how dogmatic values were used to prevent women from entering a religious sanctity where violence was used. Your dignity as a human being has been trampled time and again. One wonder on the gross injustice and so-called intellectuals, both men and women stood against human rights, freedom, democracy, and inequality with politicians cutting across all sides played a dirty game.

One cringes at such blatant discrimination and better we don’t speak about equality with the guilt and culpable silence on the part of so many in public life. Menstruation, for instance, is a natural part of women and hard to fathom how in today’s so-called modern society, women are barred in taking part in religious ceremonies.  Symbolism, a particularly religious one, can be dangerous. Sex is still a dirty world and our society lacks the spine to accept a woman asking for intimacy in the wedlock or outside, calling her all kind of names such as sluts or prostitutes.  We should ask ourselves on the why of celebrating Women Day and isn’t it mere lip service? In a country where the female form of the Hindu goddesses is revered,  we don’t shy in assaulting or casting aspersions on you, the biggest irony that we could have encountered.

Why do we give you names like mother, daughter, sister or wife, nicely forgetting that you have an identity as an entire human being and asking for your desires or needs to be fulfilled? is a legitimate right and not a favor doled out by society, read men? Last year, we witnessed the metoo movement in the Hindi film industry, opening a can of worms on so-called big names who didn’t shy in exploiting women or, for that matter, alleged rape charges.  Why no action has been taken against such men who were drunk on power and deriding the allegations made by women? There is no obvious answer but at the same time, one wonders on how the legal system is ingrained in patriarchy where a judge didn’t shy in calling it Personal Vendetta. It says a lot about how the patriarchal mindset, blurred justice or legal views, for that matter, is seen with the myopic view of the law-maker. Isn’t it high time to clean the dirt and muck raging in our institutions? One can also ask why many companies in India have failed to effectively implement the Vishaka guidelines whose objective is to protect women against harassment of any form?

The time is now, dear women, to take destiny into your hands and why go for reservations at the workplace or politics, getting high on rhetoric. Don’t you think it’s an insult to your achievements or human dignity? Women have every right to call the shots in the board room and for that matter, politics for you are no less equal than a man. The worst part is all kind of names calling are flung at you when one of your own join politics, making fun of the mental illness she might have suffered in the past or calling her a pretty face. Are you ready to condone this act? It’s not about which political party or family the person belongs to? I ask the women politicians, why this silence? Because it doesn’t suit your agenda or the fear to offend or bend the rules. Why India cannot have a women Prime Minister for more than three decades when someone like Kalpana Chawla walked the moon? It whittles down to self-belief and you are no less than a man.

Dear women, you don’t need to prove your capabilities in a male-dominated chauvinist society nor to owe explanations for your choices in wearing a short skirt or making sexual choices. You are an individual first, something nobody can wrestle away from you. There is no shame or guilt in being who you are as a person, unique and free. High time to tell the world a simple fact and none of your choice has got anything to do with any religion you are born in. You may choose to wear a Burqa, saree or a swimsuit. The choice is entirely yours.

With Love

V

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Desi parents and calling off a Big Fat Marriage


There is no such thing as a perfect marriage, particularly when the entire balance is stacked against women on what is not only the most beautiful day in her life but as she takes a step ahead. A giant leap doesn’t mean two steps back.  Unfortunately, in many cases, the marriage of unequal takes place when the bride is expected to be a good Indian girl, fulfilling family responsibilities, cooking good food for everyone and waking up on time or sacrificing her dreams to be the perfect bahu, perfect wife or perfect mother.

The prompt today is borrowed from a friend status on Facebook who wrote on the fact that Big Desi Families shouldn’t force their daughter to forcefully enter a marriage on account of the overemphasize log kya kahenge where happiness is gone for a toss. From Big Fat Indian Wedding to Big Desi Families! Call off this marriage even if means 2 days or 2 hours before, I agree fully with her. The first thing that we should discuss is that society has no right in dictating choices in what should be individual choices or preferences.

This entire ‘Marriage Sham’ or business contract is the result of my personal interpretation and not the friend’s FB status. I tell it not just to Desi Parents in India but those scattered across the globe making a bone of this so-called tradition or honor protection is ridiculous. An entire hoopla surrounding marriage coupled with the huge ego embedded in jingoistic patriarchy where the daughter’s voice is often lost and suppressed, irrespective of whether she is highly educated or not.

The worst thing is that she has no say in a decision affecting her life because some cowards are riding on the high tide that a girl is destined to follow certain roles and throwing this Paraya Dhan argument. She is not a private property or dhan, for fuck sake. This patriarchal rule has been prevalent over decades with the sole aim to exploit a girl and confining her to the role of ‘housewife’, permeating society to give an inferior complex with the subtle message that she got no right to question the daff rule superimposed by the society’s structure and internalized by in-laws. Hence, I call such marriages a fraud or sham to deceive everyone.

Image credit: Google.

You may well argue when a couple marries, they marry not just each other but also their respective families. I oppose this point of view. Let me explain: First, why on earth do we have a courtship period particularly in an arranged set up? Simple enough, both partners get to know each other, share views or appreciate differences on society, household, equality and sex. Basically, the entire marriage foundation should and must be built on equality between the husband and wife with no external interference from both sets of parents.

Here’s the catch, if one partner feels that the relationship is suffocating them owing to expectations after marriage on paying blind obeisance to parents, compelled to leave ‘her ‘job’, be a docile daughter-in-law and no right to questions the extended family when her entire self is being taken for granted, better don’t enter this labyrinth. There should always be an exit route.

It’s a question of not just self-respect but human dignity and individuality. There have been several instances where traditions have been imposed on a girl the day she got married and the extremely conservative views enforced that she must leave behind rituals and spiritual practices at home or values to adopt new belief practiced by the husband’s family.  Plainly told, it’s disrespectful to the girl and we often forget that she left her home and family to adjust in a new set up and should be made clear on the need for her ‘new family’ to respect her views, ancestral beliefs or religious practices.

During that ‘dating’ period and pre-marriage, a girl has every right to call it off if there is a feeling that her rights are being trampled and a relationship reeking of sexism, patriarchy, exploitation and unequal balance.

The biggest challenge for the girl is often the lack of support from her immediate family to call off the marriage. Cut it short, let’s not explore the external pressure put on the parents’ immediate or extended family saying that it will be shameful or the so-called false tradition being showered. It whittle down to happiness, discard this whole dishonor argument, and support the daughter and not society, as I scrolled on the comment’s thread on my friend’s status which is encouraging feedback.

Speculations will not give a girl what she has lost or compensate for the loss in happiness. There are many parents who would insist that things will get better once the marriage takes place or urging to plan for a child. Sorry to disappoint you for people with a conservative or archaic mindset will never change. The patriarchal traditions have been present in our Indian society for thousand and thousand of years stepping up the blind or orthodox beliefs.

I repeat it’s the right of not only every daughter but their parents to find the courage to call off a marriage that will bring ‘misfortune’ or destroying a life that may take decades for her to heal and free herself from the trauma when individuality is crushed. The strongest woman can be broken by being forcefully put in such a marriage.

As we discussed on the thread, the question of unwanted advice on how one should Move On after facing trauma in a relationship, marriage or even death of someone close, crops in every conversation.  It’s the biggest misnomer that can ever happen and seemingly saying just forget about what the person has been through, almost turning into unwanted apologists to false patriarchal rules.

A person cannot just move on like that as if it’s the tale of reading Arabian Nights after sex. We have been responsible for the suffering of daughters and kept silent for long enough. About time to stop hiding behind this whole marriage argument in perpetuating inequality, unwanted shame at the calling off of a marriage or for that matter, victim shaming a girl in asking what belongs to her rightfully, legally and morally after a split. This calling of names by tagging or shaming a woman by hiding behind arguments such as suffering in old age read in-laws or tradition no longer works.

There are no two ways about it: Morality, shame or religious argument can’t be bigger than happiness, support or love. Marriage hides so many facets about what is wrong today and belies the frustration, grief and cluttering of wings in place of happiness, of course not all cases. Time for Desi parents to forget about patriarchy and its obsolete rules but love for children, daughter or son should prevail. It’s simple for this practice where daughters have been stripped them of their individualism and dignity has continued for too long. Kuch toh log kahenge, logon ka kam hai kehna.

Love

V

 

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Why so much hate and double standards against Veere di Wedding?


Why does a movie need to flare up personal sentiments and stoke so much hatred on what constitutes morality or immorality? Shashanka Ghosh’s Veere Di Wedding celebrates women, freedom, and individuality in all its forms by declaring a war on patriarchy by saying it in a humor-laden manner that every opposing voice is stung and suddenly feels the movie is an assault on their personal turf.

It’s not the first time that the audience has made it a personal thing by spreading hate and venom against a movie that celebrates the individualistic women who have desires and needs, like any normal human being. The sudden hatred against its lead actors are not just laughable but reeks of sexual and patriarchal misogyny. First thing first, what constitutes morality and what doesn’t should cease to be a universal issue since this entire moral vs immoral is very subjective. Since when a masturbation scene has disturbed us so much that we have started volleying abuse against Swara Bhaskar for doing the scene. How does the scene offend us in the first place?

Image credit: Google/Indian Express.

Mass media has always made masturbation a male thing when it should have been gender neutral. Hello, hypocrisy! Suddenly, we have a serious problem when we see a woman shaking it up but it’s fun and legitimate with the American Pie series or Irfan Khan’s character taking the picture of his boss’ wife to have ‘fun’ inside the toilet. People should learn to take a chill pill. I heard someone saying on social media he felt like puking watching this dirty M act. Look within! If M is such a dirty act, then all of us should throw out every time we relieve ourselves in the morning or during the entire day. The entire problem lies with us as humans and hatred for this movie reached a new low and extreme level,  making vile attacks treading on this entire puritan or moral route showing how we have been educated wrongly on sex. Loosen up!

There is a need to lose not the virginity but inhibition, sexual repression or this whole moral argument. Why this drastic difference in rules for both boys and girls, men and women? Since when sex, casual or consensual, has become so dirty? The problem lies with our minds. We boys sleeping around make us dudes but when a woman does that, she suddenly becomes a slut! Wake up people and live in the real world or else we are all becoming like Mulayam Singh Yadav’s ‘boys make mistakes’ on rape.

This entire hatred of Veere di Wedding was so unwanted in the first place and we have suddenly become self-appointed experts on what girls talk or do among themselves. Let’s face it: Men have their dirty dude talk that we wouldn’t like the girls, no matter how close they are to us, know. If men can have some fun talks, girls have the equal right to do it among themselves. Call it what you may, bathroom selfie or girls’ chat, how do we know what secrets chicks spill among themselves!

It’s not a question about cuss words, Hindi expletives or the F-word that it should offend us by behaving like ‘society’s thekedar’. Some people have taken the high moral ground and still, want women to be the abla nari in movies to be saved by the angry young man thrashing half-dozen goons on screen. The most unfortunate aspect is that we still want women to play victims in movies which perpetuates the one-man show and the moment they take on the male bastion, we cry hoarse about the fuck word.  Get a life people and be real for we don’t live in a Saas bahu bubble. It’s not for the first time that characters are swearing in movies and why nobody cried hoarse when a movie like Omkara in the Hindi heartland or balatkar of 3 idiots were muttered. We had a good laugh over the cool quotient. As it is, so many of us use Hindi and English expletives in our daily lives and why this hypocrisy of moral police now over so-called bad influence. Time for all of us to discard this complex that we suffer from.

The biggest irony is that it’s no longer about the movie but the criticism became more political since we all know that Swara Bhaskar never flinched in airing her social views. More power to women and men like her. She has faced insults, abuse and rape threats on social media forums such as Twitter for daring to take on the political establishment and Veere di wedding is just an excuse for people to get even with her since the views don’t suit their political masters. There is a difference between art and politics but unfortunately, frustrated morons are mixing both things. Having strong political views on national issues doesn’t make one a bad professional or in Swara’s case a bad actor.

Veere di Wedding is a game changer in the way we view art, or for that matter, our conservative mindset when it comes to women, patriarchy or misogyny. The film doesn’t put down women but to the contrary, drives home important messages celebrating the Her,  reminding us that today’s India doesn’t need sexism. Intriguing how a movie has nurtured hatred and for fuck sake, it’s just a movie. Love or hate it, can we please move on and call this blatant misogyny. About the film being banned in Pakistan? The lesser the better said with trolls trying to get 2 minutes fame! Karma should be banned rather.

Spread love

V

 

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Sex shaming, naked soul and patriarchy


Vanity is a symbol. It affects women and men in equal measure. As human beings, we get conscious on how others see, perceive and judge us? It deters our liberation as humans and sexual beings. It’s no typo. You’ve read it properly. I am speaking of the three-letter words S-E-X. No, my fingers are not trembling as I type. Sexual repression is not only a bane but deters our growth and liberation.

It all started with the controversial headlines, ‘Radhika Apte sex tapes leaked’ for the film Parched that created a furore where we were verging on  insanity. I am not doing the post to be an advocate of the actor but want to air my view on symbolism, hypocrisy or our deeply embedded patriarch misogyny. Nowadays, everyone gives free and unwanted advice on the state of nakedness and sex? I mean, aren’t we all naked souls?

In the interview to NDTV, Parched actors Adil Hussain and Radhika Apte makes very fair and thought-provocation observation on the naked body and sexuality. Forget the controversy and it’s better we ignore such sensational leak or news. I am not interested in sex tapes or leak. The discussion makes me wonder how hypocrite we have become when it comes to nakedness and sex where we not only want to ban everything but also laugh it out by making ridiculous statements, pretending to take the high moral ground. I feel that the actor is being picked for her only fault is that she is a woman. Anyway, the post is not about that.

It’s a real tragedy that we hail from the land of Kamasutra but we are still shy when it comes to the exploration of our sexuality or better still, give those flimsy or childish religious justification that sex is immoral. Excuse me, immoral? I mean, on what ground? It doesn’t mean that if we don’t speak on something that it doesn’t take place in society. Like Adil Hussain said as a man he is a by-product of male patriarchy which is so true. How many men haven’t in the course of discussion made a patriarchal comment on a woman as a sex symbol or how desirable she is on account of male superiority or ignorance. I am sure the campus observation among young dudes when a girl passes by, words like gorgeous boob or ass or she’s a good fuck has been whispered with a smile and for that matter craving and fulfilling of human desires. I mean, let’s be frank about it. Of course, it’s a very flawed ideology which is the result of patriarchy that translates into male aggression. This is just one instance. Don’t get me started on who should make roti at home, wear sindoor and bear children or quench of sexual desires irrespective of the fact whether the woman desires it or not? A male bastion who calls the shots.

The debate is not about that but the point I want to make or reflect is on our sexual complexities as human beings. It’s true that women grow up with all those complexities not just as a teenage or young girl but an adult as well. It’s the body shaming like a section of people are making Radhika Apte or many of her ilk feel. Credit goes to her for owning her work and saying with dignity how proud she is on exploring her body. Well. she is a public figure. Just imagine what the commoners or women in obscure village or middle-class houses go through. Why just women? I am sure men also feel that way but in contrasting degree about their body or sexuality and it’s a different matter that they will not come out in the open to speak about the Oedipus conflict as a teenager as depicted by Freud.

Honestly speaking, I have grown up as a child or the time I discovered sex that it is something wrong or touching my body part is a grave sin punished by Gods.  Blame it on our conservative tradition that drives us to the dark age. It is the biggest fallacy when the foundation of our culture is based on sex and procreation depicted by Vasana and Sex in the Vedas. I grow up into believing that the whole thing about sex or being a virgin is a symbol of purity till the time I tried to become comfortable with it. Hey! We are humans. Yes! My virginity was broken during the college days. I was shy of speaking about sex in public and it did give me a certain sense of awkwardness of making out with someone. You know why? The way society is dealing with sex, repression, uncomfortable gaze or our lack of education. Well, as a child I was told that one gets a baby in an airplane and was thinking that I can pick up a little baby brother or baby sister when I travel on air. No! I ain’t kidding. The fault lines on sexual and naked education which is imparted the wrong way or is not told at all.

I am still learning about my body in the 30s and I strongly feel that no person can fully claim that they have explored their sexuality or their nakedness as a human being. The interview on NDTV is pushing me to explore my sexuality and nudity bared open like a free soul. There is something called the naked soul that I come across from time to time and I know of people who as artistic souls learning about their naked souls and bodies through something called body mapping. It is something that I want to know. I want to know myself better as a sexual being to conquer my freedom and liberation.

It is very important for young girls and boys to explore their sexuality in relationships but also from a metaphysical and soulful perspective to the fullest. How many of us has taken a close look at our naked bodies? There is an element of shame or repression. Let’s face it. It is imperative that we get the right kind of education on our bodies and sexuality. We don’t realize how much risks young boys and girls are at or vulnerable for that matter to be given the wrong notions on their bodies considered to be taboo. There are vultures that makes such souls an easy prey. Let’s battle this complexity by imparting the correct education and not tread on blurred lines. Had I been an artist, I would have no problem to walk naked on screen not to be vulgar but be comfortable in my skin. It’s all about artistic freedom and personal choice.  Like the Parched actors said, it’s all about liberation.

I rest my case. It’s a post written with honesty but perhaps not explored to its full potential. I shall prepare a fresh post on naked soul and sexuality in the future. Let’s mull about our sexual liberation and naked soul for running away from it doesn’t solve our complexities as human beings.

Cheerz

V

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Proud of Indian men and women


delhi

Flipping through the universal term that define democracy, I stumble on my college notes. Simply put in the layman’s term, democracy is made of the people, by the people and for the people. We read a lot of papers on freedom on midnight on the day India was liberated from the clutches of British Raj on August 15, 1947 and perhaps, December 23, 2012 is another defining moment for Indian democracy.

The young turks of India, rich, poor, men and women coming from different walks of life stormed to India Gate and Rajpath to protest against the rape against an innocent woman who was humiliated, subjected to torture, male violence and tyranny, brutally assaulted with a rod. A young woman who united the whole nation, the whole city because the youth is saying, Enough of this crap, enough of the tamasha by politicians. We want justice. A woman has the right to step out in the wee hours of the morning alone. I feel so proud today of the Indian youth who braced adversity, weathered a storm of political tyranny, goondagiri in the garb of policeman. They tried to intimidate the protestors at India Gate on Saturday and Rajpath on Sunday. But, the violent, anti-democratic and totalitarian-cum-terrorist method blatantly failed today. It was the voice of the nation which is more powerful than any gun shattering movement on earth. It is a matter of pride to see the young men and women spread on the streets of Delhi to fight injustice. Young men and women saying no to rape, no to violence and no to human oppression and exploitation.

The police force, fuelled by political power used all their might to ward off the people, they intimidated the media, reporters from Times Now were pushed and threatened with dire consequences, camera broken, women reporters threatened in those words, go from here or you will not able to stand on your feet. It’s goondagiri, the law of unlawful by law makers and the one who has the legal licence to protect us. It’s shameful. A sad day for Indian democracy, the country regarded in high esteem as the biggest democracy in the world. Mind you! The protestors were raising their voice for a fair and just cause, Justice. Justice delayed is justice denied. It’s undeniable sad that fascist methods were used today.

It shows how power is corrupted and those gentlemen and ladies will resort to any vile tactics to prevent the voice of the common man, albeit, the people. It is proof that when the common man gets angry, no power on earth can stop them. Do it at your own risk. It’s the rising of voices against the patriarchal society which is hell bent to exploit women, exploit people so that their vested interest and system is protected. Deep inside, they know that they have lost half of the battle. Rape is caused by a patriarchal society hell bent on delivering discourses on morality and religious norms and values that do not hold true at all.

The only thing that might have disturbed the purpose is the infiltration of some anti-social and political elements that found their way among the protestors. Their aim is to disband us and they have provoked violence to a certain extent. The youth must refuse to give in to these voices who are doing acts to jeopardize the movement of young, selfless men and women for a just and valuable cause that will serve as a reference in years to come. No, we must not give in to cheap tactics of politicians and refuse to fall prey to violence. It’s no secret that some violence were provoked by the men in khaki and we must refuse provocation but we must resist as well. Half of the battle is already won and we shall not falter towards the end of the race.

I am sad that I couldn’t be in Delhi and India right now to protest against the perpetuation of the evil, patriarchal society’s ‘fucked up’ rules. But, I am proud that a nation rode free and fearless on the streets. As a reporter, I feel immense pride within to see the movement of the youth of India who is up in arms against a corrupt system and condemn usage of tear gas and intimidation by police against women and young people. I support my colleagues from the Indian media fraternity who is doing everything to show the real picture to the people and, thus, contributing in their own way to make voices heard and make a difference.

Proud To Be Indian

V