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Being Aware and the Balancing Act

Every month, we receive a bank statement recording our inflow and outflow of cash transactions. It’s the balancing act. I wonder whether our lives resemble the bank statement where an act of kindness can earn us a coin of goodness and a negative act depreciates our value. Sure it does. But, it goes beyond that. Limitless like the seamless oceans and lakes.

It’s my firm belief that there are two kinds of people in this world. Firstly, as a result of the pain and suffering inflicted by others, they choose to make others suffer in equal measure and, secondly, there are bruised souls who were treated unkindly and ruthlessly but they spread love and treat their fellow humans with ‘free love’, gentleness and compassion. It depends on what we want to become in life. We are all agents of free will and prisoners of the bad triggers. Once a friend told me after I was freaking out post my terrible break-up, ‘But remember at all times, that someone is always looking over you, and they’ll carry you out of this, if you allow them to, ok? ‘

This friend of mine is Nisha. It’s been ages that we haven’t been in touch owing to priorities and caught up in our respective worlds where there is hardly anytime speaking to each other but I always read our conversations which I haven’t deleted in my old mail. Trust me, it’s an exchange that dated for more than eight years and she has always been a huge pillar of support to me. Someone that I shall always respect for gently showing me the way and bringing such good vibes to my life. It leads me to the thought about bad triggers and how we separate the bad apples from the good ones in the basket.  Is there something called ‘bad triggers? Yes, may be. I am not qualified to ponder about. But, I can only speak from personal experience. I have seen the amazingly perfect life which is subjective from my standpoint and the real bad with being in and out of jobs coupled with debts and EMI. I almost went mad. I was fighting frustration every single and had no choice but to make a fresh start. There were depression and illusion that I suffered from.  But, it’s the past, right?

The point which I want to make is whether bad or good karma can be shifted among humans, similar to our bank accounts or business where we end up making profit or loss. It’s tricky, right. I have always cursed my former employer who pushed me and the others in the dark where I was forced to resign since the company’s account was in doldrums. Cut the crap. Shall I? Indeed. In fact, I have started reading Life Positive magazine where there are themes such as forgiveness and healing practices. I came to this thought after reading an article on forgiveness. It’s quite an irony of sort since I neither forgive nor forget. But, someone mentioned in an article that when you are treated badly, that one person is transferring his or her good Karma to you. It’s quite interesting. If we delve deeper, it makes so much sense to us.
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Those days, I am striving to practice the Power of Now to be more aware and live in the moment. I want to be present in the Now and not let the mind drift, be it while exercising, doing meditation, chewing the food or during Surya Namaskar. The mind is so powerful that it can overcome us in a jiffy where our thoughts wander negatively. I’ve experienced it. I know how bad things can get when the mind is in a turmoil. The practice mindfulness is very empowering and soothes our senses. Light helps us a lot. I want to be more aware of it and love to fix my eyes on the light. After all, in the yoga class, Guru-ji always tells us to stare at the light and don’t blink. It’s such a powerful source of energy, I believe. It’s our relationship with happiness that matters a lot. Breathing in and out brings so much joy which helps us to combat stress or bout of depression, flushing out negativity or diluting out anger. I love the sense of quietness when I sit in meditation and don’t let thoughts to filter. The state of emptiness is happiness and food to the soul.

Breathing in and out brings out this happiness we all long for. It’s the Now. The deep breathing techniques, In and Out help us to achieve this state of stillness and happiness. It’s been four months that I am doing yoga regularly and there has been a marked improvement where now I am able to do poses that I wasn’t able to do earlier. My Guru told me today that I have made good progress while earlier, the body was too stiff. It gives so much happiness to feel the positive energy running in the body.

I believe that vibes or energy choose us for a specific purpose. After having been through ups and downs, it’s not without purpose to say that I honestly want to be a healer. I want to empower people and accompany them in their tough moments but also good ones. I want to carry the positive energy and spread happiness. There is nothing that happens without a purpose, good or bad. Everything happens for a reason, right. The past lessons are leading me to believe that in future, I can make a difference to someone’s life and help to heal them. Known or unknown people are bound by a chain in the world of good or bad, positive or negative.

Spread the love and positive energy.

Stay beautiful and in the moment




Work-in-progress, seeker and bundle of contradictions. Stubborn and Refusal to grow up and constantly in search of myself, I blurt it out on my space. Drop in and share some love. Indian by choice.

29 thoughts on “Being Aware and the Balancing Act

  1. This is such a refreshing thing – mindfulness. I have been practicing mindfulness for a long time now and have known to create magic through mindfulness. In fact I am even able to bring so many changes in others lives through my workshops and that is what gives me the most satisfaction in life.

    1. Thanks Menaka. It’s the things that came to my mind and what I want to do. I have started to practise mindfulness which is still at a nascent stage. I want to be part of the change. Do share your learning with me. It’s such a satisfying feeling, I am sure.

  2. Very insightful post. The present to me is like your very dependable friend in high school. They’re not cool, maybe even a little too boring. But once that friend has bailed you out of a few situations, you realize their worth. Still, we prefer glamor (the future), and the bad kid (the past). More fun. On the surface at least.

    It does change everything when you practice mindfulness. I really need to focus on that more.

    1. Thanks so much and liked the idea of making Past, Present and future like strong character souls. It’s a huge learning and next time, things bother me and will see it in that way. It’s a great step towards mindfulness and you already there. It’s been long that I have been with the bad kid or partner.

      1. I play it quite well, the part of the very well adjusted individual. I never heed my own advice. You’re absolutely right. To me the people we meet throughout several lives are guides, and to be seen more like actors who willingly played several parts alongside you. Problem is, when I’m confronted with people I know are there for my growth, it’s too easy to focus purely on the dislike. But if I learn to be mindful of my own advice (pun fully intended), yeah, I’m pretty far ahead in the game / play then.

      2. I think it happens with most of us who never heed our own advice. Being well adjusted is half the battle won and me took, seek inspiration in anyone who has this thing going. It can be a toddler as well. I like this idea of being far ahead in the game.

      3. Likewise. And so true about the toddler. Kids still have that innocence, and kindness. About half a year ago it was actually kids who put me back on my feet. Their parents, too, but the kids played a very important part in it. At least we who don’t listen to ourselves (all that much) can help others. Another battle won.

      4. Yes, that makes them so truthful. I have a one year old funny nature who is so super active and when he sees me, he prances. Unfortunately, he caught the cold and has been admitted to the hospital. Hope he recovers swiftly. He is my youngest friend. Sad we don’t listen to our inner voice.

      5. Oh I really hope he recovers quickly!!!!! The inner voice is our older sibling. And sometimes, in true younger sibling fashion, we just know that we know better. When really we don’t. At all.

      6. I love the idea about siblings…true we doggedly believe that we know. It’s the ego speak. Yeah, hoping that my friend will recover soon and sad that he cannot speak to tell how he is feeling. That’s the thing with todlers.

      7. I do hope your friend recovers as quickly as possible. Well, if I look at my brother, who is older, I know he gives me good advice (usually 😃), but do I heed it? Not as often as I should!

      8. Yeah! My friend the toddler…I miss him calling us to play with him. Hehe that’s the thing with advice we hardly pay heed like my smoke, though I had a drastic cut for 3 to 5 a minimum.

      9. Honestly, I would miss that, too. When I was nine, I had a friend who was sixteen. I nearly burst with pride when she introduced me to her 15-year-old friend as her friend. Not her youngest or even younger friend, her friend!

        The smoking thing – and this story is so typically Hungarian – reminded me of attending a relative’s funeral. A few of us lit up, at a very respectful distance. Cue elderly friend of the deceased who comes up to us with the words, “put down this filthy c*** right this minute!” Then proceeded to tell us that he’d been on said relative’s case, too.

        He didn’t say it in an obnoxious manner, just stating a fact. And he was smoking, too. Just not the same c***** brand we were. I’m not sure the dark humor translates well, but even though you don’t think about it, when it does you know that’s the way it had to be.

      10. That’s quite a dark humor and after all, friends are friends. Age is just a number. Yeah, this guy was quite something when he himself was smoking trying to act like a saint. I love this last line and yes we humans can be like that. Strange but still makes us alive:)

      11. He was more trying to keep us safe. As in, “well kids, it’s too late for me. But you stop.”

        Hungarian humor is very dark. The understanding of life. I think I have a post way back where I talk about this one band that’s typically Hungarian, even though only the singer is.

        Remember when all these lists were going around on FB, “you know you’re [insert nationality] when . . . ? The Hungarian one had, “you’re singing songs about death and dying in a cemetery with your friends and you’re having a good time.

        I’m not defending it. When my dad was in the hospital, and we knew he was dying, I told him this really morbid Hungarian joke. Basically, guy wakes up in the hospital with the curtains drawn. Asks the doctor what happened. Is everything ok? Doctor tells him surgery went well, but there was a fire across the street and “we didn’t want you to wake up and think something had gone wrong.”

        My mom (who’s not Hungarian) really didn’t want me to tell the joke. But I had to, and my dad loved it. He’s the one who taught me most of them, even my favorite one, which unfortunately you can’t translate. But I appreciate that not everyone sees it that way. So I do pick my audience carefully.

      12. Yes, during tough times it becomes difficult to make a joke but can work wonders on an ailing person. It brings a smile on the face. Last year, my uncle was on the dying bed in hospital and told him once you recover, I will come home and we can sit to gosspip. A feeble smile appeared on his face. True, we need to know with whom we make the joke.

      13. Yes! Just knowing what to say to make it easier. Never thought about it until now, but I think the key is to do something as natural as possible. That’s great you could help your uncle like that! Sorry to hear about his passing though.

      14. He passed away last year and remember me & my cousin spending the nights at the hospital lobby since he wanted to keep a check. In a way, he became free since there was too much suffering.

  3. Have this constant fight going on in my mind for last 2-3 days and here I read this post. I always question that without reason why a person is always treated bad. I just keeping on telling myself do good and things would fall in place. I hope we can make the positive difference

    1. I think we have one life and need to try become more human. I understand that not everyday is same and our mood changes which is a normal thing to do. You know just yest heard someone whom I know in 12th succumbed to tumor. Though. I wasn’t friend with him and last time met him was a bit less than 2 decade. I still remember the smile on his face when he won the scholarship when he topped. It’s a reminder that life is short and we need to make the most of it. I want to make a difference to lives.

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