I shall tell you an open secret: Insecurity gnaws the best of us, the scribbler we respect, the successful business honcho or film star we envy, near and dear ones, our favorite barista or the man or woman wielding the biggest power on earth. How about a white lie to the self. We often do that, in pretending to be our own self and how strong we are to the world? Truth be told: We are vulnerable humans who get insecure from time-to-time.
The insecurity to face the day, winning over the super hot girl whom we will never propose for the fear of being rejected, turned down by the much-coveted job, writing-yeah right, speaking to someone in a confident and easy manner, public speaking or battle our demons. We often fail to concentrate and the wandering mind that can break us into tiny pieces. Does it? Nopes, it’s just that we suffer lapses which equip us to learn about our shortcomings. It’s natural to compare ourselves with others and envy their wit or lifestyle where insecurity grapple us. It can be anything, right from unhealthy criticism, fear of judgment or backbiting that sometimes sap our confidence and vitality. A tale of counting sour grapes in the box that leads us to believe that everything is sour.
There was a time when I thought that I would never be able to shine or find a job during the toughest period in life. I lost my sanity and was slowly ravaged by the fire of depression, insecurity and monotonous flow of life. It’s okay. We are humans. We have every right to stumble or fall. Don’t judge yourself when on some days, you become insecure. Once a friend told me, don’t drive yourself to the wall. It’s true. Never do that to yourself. Be a pearl in the ocean infested with poison or monsters.
It is fear that created insecurity in my book. The same fear can destroy our inner core and it is something that one doesn’t wish to others. Learn to chill about it. Vent if you may, But, never let it soar and munch your soul like termite. Insecurity can be just about anything, right from love to money, a car, travel or professional woes. Every day is a battle, I believe. Our struggles never end. Why let insecurity attack us in the unlikeliest of places?
Everyone has a story. We would never know who is waging a battle and fighting human insecurity at any juncture in life. It’s about dreams and life has an unusual way of knocking us off the perch. The moral of the story is that we need to climb the hill all over again where every sacrifice has been wiped off by the violent storms. It’s okay. We shall do it differently, this time.
It is sometimes our ego that prevents us from learning, the misplaced and dogged attitude in seeing our life from the compass of others or the competitive us who want to run against time. The list is long. My plans to get back to Mumbai is forever delayed. It makes me insecure at times and trust me, I get that a lot. But, I am learning the virtue of patience. I am in a happy space right now and things will work when the time is right.
The next time insecurity tries to tear you, just smile, breath and dream bigger but bear in mind that you are unique as a person. It can never destroy you. Let it do the dance of fury till it gets tired and is wiped out.