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Excerpt from unpublished draft: In the name of love

Hey folks,

Sharing with you an excerpt from the unpublished manuscript which I am writing since four years. Maybe sharing the excerpt will help me revive the book that I haven’t touched for ages and yes, the first draft is lying unattended in a corner.  Do read the excerpt and tell me what do you think:

In the name of love

It’s the biggest lie I’ve ever spoken in life. Can love turn a saint, a man who loved Zoya like anything,  into a devil overnight? Her silence was killing me. I turned into an obsessive lover. My life was going to change in the next few days, months and years. I was denying it. She was making me jealous when she went for chai with the dude we met at the tapdi last time. I will not let it happen. I am obsessed with Zoya. I am plotting to kill that guy but I have the sweetest revenge in mind. It doesn’t matter that I become a sinner. I am in love with her.

It’s not a question of being right or wrong, saint or devil. It’s a question of love.  We met the last time and hugged each other tightly. The tension was palpable. I was getting jealous when Zoya told me that her parents were planning to hitch her with an NRI in US. We were holding hands. I abruptly separated our palms and started walking. She fumed, “Ouch! What the fuck? You’ve hurt me?” I apologized.  Her face expressed hurt and angst. We walked in silence. Both us knew why.

There was no communication between us for days till we decided to meet at Barista in Colaba and ordered two Cappuccino. I couldn’t face her. She asked, “What’s wrong? Still angry?”. The smile lit her face like the crescent moon. I faked an anger, “Is our relationship hurting you, Zoya?” The cheerfulness disappeared from her face. “What do you mean?” she asked. “You’ve lied to me,” I said. “The last time you went for tea with my friend behind my back and never bothered to say that you went along with him. I think he likes you. He told that he wants to sleep with you and that you told him that I am just an option in your life and not a priority.” Zoya was on the verge of tears. Her face seethed with anger.

“Tell that stupid friend of yours to stop lying. You better stop hanging with such despo. I thought that he is a good and decent guy,” she said. Zoya’s mood was spoilt. I am the culprit. Yes, I lied to her. She picked her brown bag, “I am going back home now. Yes! Tell this guy not to ever appear in front of me or else, I will turn spew venom at him and all those cuss words he couldn’t even imagine in his wildest dreams.”

Zoya walked away from me, trying to control her tears. I was lying on the bed when the phone beeped, “I will always love you, no matter where we are. It’s up to you whether you trust me or not.” I felt guilty that night. I have lied about an innocent guy who never harmed me and made the most beautiful girl who loved me cry. Do I deserve Zoya’s love? I ain’t sure about it. Why the fuck did I lie to her? This jealousy is killing me. I promised never to let anything hurt her. But, I did. What kind of love is that?

With Love





Work-in-progress, seeker and bundle of contradictions. Stubborn and Refusal to grow up and constantly in search of myself, I blurt it out on my space. Drop in and share some love. Indian by choice.

34 thoughts on “Excerpt from unpublished draft: In the name of love

  1. jealousy in love is normal but very often it destroys the relationship, I believe love and jealousy just cant be separated but we should use our brains! boy I used to be jealous or what! I was very possessive but luckily kept my mouth shut 😉

    1. Yeah, a certain amount is normal but it can kill a relationship when it gets to an obsessive level. As we gain maturity, we understand that love can be free and do with a lil sprinkle of jealously. Ha!

      1. I think it is nature- it is just that I don’t love that passionately any more, I have a suspicion that if I do I will be possessive all over again! anger and jealousy are tough to tame! all we can do is not let them become destructive-

  2. Possesiveness, jealousy and break-up are the truths of regular love stories.
    Honestly speaking Vishal, I would like this story to tread onto a different path where there is break-up but no heartbreak, where there is a sense of possession but without jealousy. These are just pointers. It is your story and you have the power to give a direction as per your call.

    1. So true, Anamika, love, break, tissue, tears…Thanks lot for the input Anamika and I will take them on board. The novel means a lot to me, though heart break is a part. A hint: It’s a cross religious love story.

  3. It can make for a good plot..After all there can always be love stories . It requires editing…like in the beginning paragraph, the use of present and past tenses does not gel well….

  4. Vishal, I finally got to give it a read! First things first. Sounds very promising as a story to me. You should definitely go for the book. Your characters will benefit from being well-rounded. Being succinct will also help you lead the story forward. I definitely think you should get the rest of the story written instead of letting it languish for another four years! As Sunaina says, crispness comes from editing and making the plot really tight so that the story flows effortlessly. Very lucid flow of words!

    1. Thanks so much Esha for the inputs and always being encouraging. The feedback is honest and that’s what I was looking for. These are areas I need to polish and I must confess that grammar is not my forte. Need to work on the areas:)

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